Singleness

Many of us have been single at some period of our lives and to me the only time you can be classed as a single is if you are able to understand the purpose of relationships and the consequences of the heart that comes with being knitted together. In order to understand the reason for a relationship we would first have to know if we are ready for one and the best time to find out is when you are not in one. Sounds like an oxymoron, I know but let’s examine what the bible says about being single or as some people might say unmarried, I prefer the term single because it’s a disposition rather than a status.

I’ve come to that realization only recently (while  writing this article) that being single is not mentioned much in the bible because everyone wanted to get married, and I don’t give them wrong, marriage is a beautiful thing and in Bible times is was revered and the young men and women were trained how to be a strong man, a father to their sons, a priest to their households. Women were natured to be suitable wives who cared for their families and were diligent and industrious in business.

So why are we now so unwilling to enter into holy matrimony? Well, its because we don’t know its purpose because we have been going from boyfriend to girlfriend from the age of 13, some of us did it behind our parents backs because they might kill you if they knew, and in front of our friends faces for rank. But whatever the case, we have not taken the time to find out the purpose of marriage and this has caused us to enter meaningless relationship time and time again, have no fear Gospel Globe’s singleness a season article is here.

In this article I wish to explore the purpose for singleness. Many of us don’t see singleness as a relevant status or season because we often just see it as a slow time in our relationships, a rut, but changing the mindset towards this time is vital to understanding the ultimate relationship status of marriage. Funnily enough Facebook doesn’t have divorce as a relationship status, and I’m grateful that Mark Zuckerberg didn’t include it.

It took me a long time to put this article together and I’m glad, I really would not want to write anything that misrepresents God and his view on any topic, so I headed to the instruction manual for a reason for being single I wanted to avoid the most abused text related to being unmarried, 1 Corinthians 7: 27-35, where Paul outlined exactly what I was searching for.

Many of us, however, don’t take the time to read verse 25 where he says that he doesn't have a command from God but it was his opinion based on wisdom from God. So I tried searching elsewhere and found myself in the beginning. In Genesis 2 God creates man, gave him room and board and a job. A very exhaustive job of tending to the garden and I assume when that was completed and man became bored He then assigned the task of naming every animal. Well as far as I can see, Adam was quite busy, but I’m sure when He was roaming through the garden with his best friend Butch the dog he realized that Butch had someone to go home to after and he had none.

Adam may not have said anything to God when they were liming later in the afternoon, but God realized that he was alone. Or Adam may have told God, “Eh meh boi, wa bout me? I doh wa love up too owa?” then God created Eve for him as a companion, a suitable helper not just a mate!

I said all of that to say, God was the one who knew that the man was ready to have a relationship not the other way around, where we tell God that we are ready for one. God knew his servant so well, because of the time they spent together, that he was ready to handle the responsibility of a relationship, of being knitted together with another human that has emotions, desires and their own destiny. Before God gave him the person, Adam was working in the kingdom, doing his part in the world and I’m guessing that he was doing it very assiduously because he had no distraction that God decided to reward him with a  suitable helper, a woman (as Adam called her).

So let us tack-back to 1 Corinthians where Paul outlined the reason to stay single, to be free from the concerns of life, to spend time doing God’s work and thinking how to please Him, to be devoted to God, to be holy in body and spirit, and to serve with as few distractions as possible. Honestly I never thought of these reasons valid enough to stay single because I know that marriages are of God and two is better than one… and the list goes on and on but understanding that singleness is a season would clear it up .

How do I know that being single is just a season? Let’s look at Adam in the garden, we were not told how long he was naming the animals and tending the garden for, and it most likely would not have been a day. Using this as our guide we see that there is a timeframe which we have to do most of what God has called us to do in the Kingdom, if we didn’t know what it was Paul certainly told us.

Being single in the Kingdom leaves you with enough free time to help out in as many ministries as you can, spend time getting closer to God and knowing how to please him and serving Him in body and spirit. This is a great time to ask God to show you the type of husband or wife He wants you to be and to pray for your future wife or husband, that God prepares them as much as He is preparing you for them.

Many of us, including me, have prayed that God would send a husband or wife quickly, so that we would not burn with lust. But my hope is that after reading this article we see that we find the purpose in being single and if we find the purpose we would be too busy to consider the lust and temptation that comes our way. Get busy for God, there is always work in the Kingdom, God would see your diligent work and reward you with a helper, suitable for the destinies He has called you both to fulfill in the earth as a couple.

This is not an advocacy for remaining single, by no means, but it is a case for finding and accomplishing the purpose for your singleness rather than searching for a wife or husband through failed attempts of relationships. Understanding the purpose of singleness would cause you to realize that all relationships should essentially lead to marriage; any other type is a set-up for heart break and may lead to bitterness.

That bitterness from previous relationships would always permeate through others making it difficult for that person that God has set aside for you to embrace and love you the way He intended because you are guarded. Please instead of going through heartbreak and the headache of finding yourself a husband or wife let God do it, as you do His work.

Written by :

cherry davis

 

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